Just a Random Post About Life, Relationships, and Men

I have been meaning to write a post like this for a while, and I won't keep you long.  Martin did come in last night.  And it is clear that the tension is still there.  I have to admit I nearly lost it at the airport because I went to hug him (oh, it felt so good to be near him), and he held onto me while he shook my brother's hand.  I wanted to burst into tears.  I knew right then that without the Lord, I would have gone back to all the old ways.

Last night, he barricaded himself in the garage.  He is mad at Mom, and he is mad at me.  Well, maybe that's not the right word.  He is so disgusted by life that he can't enjoy anything or say anything positive.  I really had to work through my anger and frustration last night.

This morning I was better until he saw me.  Since I know he doesn't follow my blog (thankfully), I'll say that when he saw me this morning, he "sized" me up with his eyes.  I was really mad!  How dare he look at what does not belong to him!  There is only one thing he wants from me, and this time, he is not getting it.  (Okay, blog readers, for those of you who don't know the story, we have never gone all the way.  We have been physical, but there has been a barrier that I refuse to cross in spite of his pressure.)

Why is it that in the middle of all his anger he can still think about being intimate?  That is the mystery of men, isn't it?  The only men I have ever known have wanted one thing from me--sex!  The worst part is that I have been as generous as I could in every area. There were days that he treated me like the scum of the earth and yet, I was so needy, I took some physical intimacy with him.  I figured that rejecting him would wound his ego.

You know, I was stupid!  In my marriage, I never told my husband no.  Never!  I even let him rape me in exchange for doing something I really wanted to do.  I have always been too accommodating because I am one of those weird women who craves it.  Ever hear of the Love Languages?  Mine is definitely physical!  It is the main one, and always has been.

I am so glad that God woke me up and made me realize that I had been selling myself short for most of my life.  I have always been the one giving, going out of my way to smooth things over, and even being willing to change.  I actually let my ex and Martin control me.  Pretty sad, isn't it?

I so appreciated tonight what my sister-in-law said to me on the phone.  I told her Martin would probably yell at me for not doing something right, and I said it was not big deal.  He could go ahead and yell.  She jumped in and told me not to let him.  She said that she and my brother had the outsider's view.  When Martin comes back, the entire house caters to him.  That is wrong!  Tonight was a big victory for me.  I made a pasta salad, and I knew that he and my daughter wouldn't like it.  So I went ahead and grilled hamburgers too.  My plan is to make the meals I like, but I don't mind fixing something easy on the side if I know that he (and my daughter) would not like the meal.  That is a concession I can make.

Well, enough of my rambling tonight.  Be sure to check out my current giveaways.  One only has 9 entries, and I just added something to it.  I have contacted a lot of companies for possible giveaways, and I have loads of reviews to catch up on this weekend.  So watch out, friends!  Thanks for reading my post tonight.  And thanks for the encouragement I received.  As Boobies says, there is a man out there for me, and I will find him one day.  And he will be the right one!  (If you have never checked out her website, you need to.  It is honestly not offensive, but she does have an adult review here and there.  But she is a great blogger! And a classy lady!)

This Day in History November 5, 1831

Ever heard of Nat Turner and his infamous slave rebellion?  This day in history was significant in his life.  Read on about this courageous African American.

Nathaniel "Nat" Turner was born October 2, 1800 in Southampton County, Virginia.  Benjamin Turner, his owner, was kind enough to teach him to read.  Through reading the Bible, Nat Turner studied Christianity in depth and came to believe that it was wrong.  His people tended to see him as a prophet, and he basically kept to himself while devoting his time to prayer, fasting, and study.  He was also known for seeing visions from God that told him what to do and how to do it.

When he was 21, he ran away from his owner, but he returned a month later due to one of these visions from God.  He continued to preach to his people and even to white people about repenting and turning to God.  I could spend a long time going over his visions and many things that happened to him before the rebellion, but you can do that by checking out the links below.

In 1830, he was sold to Joseph Travis.  Even though his owner was nice to him, Turner was awaiting the go ahead from God to slay those who had enslaved him.  It was an eclipse of the sun in February 1831, that confirmed to him what God intended for him to do.  The rebellion began on August 21 of that year.  He and his men went from house to house murdering entire slave-owning families while they slept and any other white men they found on their way. (That is absolutely horrible!!)  They freed slaves as the slave owners were killed.  About 40 slaves ultimately joined with Turner. 

Within 48 hours, the rebellion was squelched, but Turner was not captured for months.  He and his fellow slaves killed about 55 white people.  He was finally discovered on October 30, and he was turned over to the authorities.  His court-appointed lawyer published The Confessions of Nat Turner as a way of explaining Turner's way of thinking.

It was on this day in 1831 that Nat Turner was tried and convicted for the slave rebellion.  It was but a week later that he was hanged.  They skinned his body and gave it out to the white people at the hanging as souvenirs (that is horrible too!). There were several accounts as to how many blacks were hanged as a result of the rebellion. At least 18, but one site says 55.  It was estimated that about 75 slaves participated in this rebellion.  The really sad thing is that over 200 slaves who were innocent and did not even live in Virginia were murdered by white mobs because it was claimed that these slaves had a connection to Turner.  Of course, it was just an excuse--it was really retaliation.

While I believe with all my heart that slavery is wrong, what Nat Turner did was wrong, too.  I am reminded of Martin Luther King, Jr.  No matter what you may think of him, you cannot deny the fact that he advocated peace.  He would never have condoned what Turner did.  Yes, both men essentially paid the same price for their actions, but who is remembered in a positive light?  King, not Turner. 

For more information, check out these informative sites:

http://blueandgraytrail.com/event/Nat_Turner_and_the_Slave_Revolt

http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/aia/part3/3p1518.html

http://www.blackpast.org/?q=aah/turner-nat-1800-1831

http://teluudailies.blogspot.com/2010/08/nat-turners-slave-rebellion.html

Free-Wheeling Friday--How to Seduce a Scoundrel by Vicky Dreiling Review

Summary from goodreads: When Lady Julianne Gatewick realizes the rake of her dreams thinks of her as practically his sister, she decides it's time to get even. The charming Marc Darcett, Earl of Hawkfield, is every lady's fantasy, but he's determined to evade virgins and their matrimonial traps - especially his best friend's sister. 

Hawk reluctantly agrees to be Julianne's guardian for the season, but he's having trouble resisting his gorgeous ward. Worse still, she's taunting him by flirting with every scoundrel in London - and he's sworn to protect her! Certain she's learned her tricks from the authoress of that scandalous publication "The Secrets of Seduction", Hawk sets out to uncover the writer's identity. But he never expects to find the formerly angelic Julianne behind the mask - and between his sheets.

How to Seduce a Scoundrel by Vicky Dreiling

My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I am normally a fan of old-fashioned romances. I tend to enjoy a good Regency romance where the lovers struggle, and the end, everything works out the way you want it to. This book definitely falls into this predictable genre, and was definitely a light, fun read.

The author created two very likeable characters. Hawk steals the show even though he is a rake. I love the fact that we get to see him grow and mature as he comes face to face with his desire for Julianne.  I always love the passion that a man like Hawk brings to a story like this.  I loved the genuine chemistry and relationship that he and Julianne enjoyed.  I always love to see a couple who can play together like they do.  I personally think that if a relationship does not have a degree of fun to it that you just may as well give it up.  I often think of romances way back in the day were austere and emotionless.  I am so grateful for authors like this one who can change that perception.

Thankfully the adult words and mild profanity were not too horrible.  I felt like I could basically stomach that since it was not too rampant.  Do realize that there may be some offensive language but not nearly as much as many romances I have read this year.

There are really only two things that keep this from being a 4-star rated book, in my opinion. I think that the blossoming romance between Hawk and Julianne is too rushed.  But then again, I did not read the first book in the series.  The main thing that rubbed me the wrong way was the intimate scenes between the two.  Granted, my moral fiber never enjoys the fact that two characters have sex before marrisge.  I was glad the intimate scenes were not any more detailed than they were, but I could have done with less detail.  In the bedroom, less is always more.  (I like the way that sounded!)

In conclusion, I can definitely recommend this book to anyone who enjoys a good romance.  I was glad to see some moral fortitude from the characters--Hawk especially.

I won a copy of this book and was not financially compensated for my review.  All opinions are 100% mine.

View all my reviews

About the Author

(from http://www.vickydreiling.com/bio.html)

Vicky Dreiling is a confirmed historical romance junkie and Anglophile. Frequent business trips to the UK allowed her to indulge her passion for all things Regency England. Bath, Stonehenge, and Spencer House are among her favorite places. She is, however, truly sorry for accidentally setting off a security alarm in Windsor Castle.  That unfortunate incident led her British colleagues to nickname her “Trouble.”

When she’s not writing, Vicky enjoys reading, films, concerts, and most of all, long lunches with friends. She holds degrees in English literature and marketing. A native Texan, she shares her home with her daughter and a spoiled mini-lop rabbit that lives in a slightly gnawed cardboard cottage. 

This Day in History November 4, 1995

This was kind of a fun one for me today.  It was on this day in 1995 that Key Arena opened for its first sporting event (wasn't I just there last weekend??).  I hadn't realized it had been so recent.  Speaking from my experience, I have been there twice.  One for a Bon Jovi concert earlier this year and just this past weekend for the Women of Faith Conference.

Key Arena is located in downtown Seattle in an area called the Seattle Center.  This is an area that is very historic since it was the site of the 1961 World Exposition.

Look Familiar?

Most of the time, you will Seattle University's Men's Basketball team or the Seattle Storm of the WNBA.  It used to be the home of the NBA Seattle Supersonics.  In fact, their first regular game that season was the opening game of this arena.  They played against the L.A. Lakers, and the Sonics won 103-89.

Isn't it just like professional sports to "demand" a new arena and then leave?  And basically, that is what happened with the Supersonics.  Oh, and the reason it it called Key Arena is that KeyCorp game 15.1 million for the naming rights of the arena.

For more information, check out these sites:
http://www.brainyhistory.com/days/november_4.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/KeyArena
(I don't usually use Wikipedia, but this one cited a lot of sources and used footnotes.  So I chose to go with it!)

Win Your Gifts Hop (Ends 11/7) U.S./Canada and WW (Closed)

Welcome to this fantastic event hosted by Simply Stacie and Makobi Scribe!  This is going to be a big blog hop, and it is a chance for you to get a jumpstart on your holiday shopping.  With the economy the way it is, aren't we all looking for a way to save money on Christmas?  I sure know I am.

Prize Package #1:  U.S./Canada--This one begins with Lovable Labels (an absolutely awesome company!) who supplied a "Gift Seals and Address Pack."    I got to review the Sno Berries  Gift Seals and Address Labels:

They have several other designs which you can see right here.  I can't tell you how wonderful these are.  At Christmas time, I am always having to write From:  Ruth and Martha  on so many times that I get sick of it!  I never mind writing to, but from gets old.  With these labels, you don't have to write it!  They are already printed for you with a really cute design.  And you don't have to hunting for tape--they are self-adhesive.  And with Lovable Labels, once they are attached, they do not come off!  And I can prove it.  I reviewed their Think Pink labels, and those labels are still attached!  This is in spite of water, dirt, cold, and being tossed around.  The bags and cases on which I put them look worse than the labels!

As for the address labels, I always like to send winter-themed address labels on my packages and letters during the holidays.  Depending on the pack you choose, you can get labels that extend past Christmas (like mine) and will fix you up for the entire winter season!

Playing the lead role in the U.S./Canada pack is Lovable Labels who is offering one "Gift Seals and Address Pack."  Now it wouldn't be much of a giveaway if I didn't offer some gifts to go with that.  In addition to these seals, I will be offering  Jobar's Silhouette Night Light:

Depression Era Recipes by Patricia S. Wagner:

The Night Before Christmas DVD narrated by Kevin Kline:

Now on to the International Prize Pack. 

Here is what is included:

1.  a white and blue bag with horses and it says "Espana"--very nice

2. Kids Cooking CD-Rom

3. A brown-white monkey picture frame

4.  Audubon Common Loon with real bird calls--and it does work

And I have added $5 Paypal to this international giveaway!!

So now to the giveaway details.  There is a rafflecopter form below for the U.S. Canada giveaway.  You will need to click here for the international one (there will be another link to it below).  Please enter in the correct form.  If you have any problems, feel free to leave a comment below, and I will do my best to assist you.  Giveaways will end promptly at 9:00 P.M. Pacific time November 7.  Best of wishes to all.  And when you are done here, don't forget to hop on to the other blogs to win some awesome prizes!  

This rafflecopter form is the for the U.S./Canada giveaway.

This Day in History November 3, 1952

Well, today's fact celebrates someone who made my dinner possible.  Quite seriously.  The man in the picture was Clarence Birdseye (I did not know that brand was actually named after a person!).  He was born in 1886, and he was a scientist who spent some time in the Arctic.  It was there that he began to discover how to effectively freeze foods.  He discovered the food frozen slowly was not able to be eaten, but food frozen quickly was perfectly fine to eat.  It was fish that first led him to this discovery.

According to various reputable websites, it was on this day in 1952 that he first marketed this frozen food:

While he was not the first to freeze foods, he developed the highly effective process that preserves the original flavor of the food as much as possible.

Birdseye was quite a businessman, and I could spend a lot of time talking about so many things he did.  He was responsible for marketing frozen foods in such a way that people finally began to buy them.  By the 1950's, frozen food sales exceeded one billion.  (Did you read that? The 1950's?  Billion?  Can you even imagine what the equivalent of that would be now?)

So because I used frozen peas in my dinner tonight, I can thank Birdseye.  No, it was not his brand, but I would say that I can still thank him.  You know how it is.  First the brand name,  then the generic!

He is a fascinating person, and if you would like to read more about him, follow these links:
http://www.infoplease.com/dayinhistory/November-3
http://www.sciencecontrol.com/clarence-birdseye-biography-1886%E2%80%931956.html
http://www.bookrags.com/biography/clarence-birdseye/

This Day in History November 2, 1889

Well, what a momentous day.  On this day in 1889, North Dakota and South Dakota became the 39th and 40th state.  I find this pretty amazing. I never thought two states would enter our union in one day.  Before 1803, the Dakotas were practically nonexistent except for fur-trapping.  The Lewis and Clark Expedition first explored it in 1804.

As you can imagine, the Dakota territory quickly increased in population, and a division occurred so that a petition for statehood could be made.  And it was February 22, 1889.  Although Cleveland was president at this time, it was his successor, Harrison, that signed the bills into law, thus making the territories states.

I have been to South Dakota--Mt. Rushmore, Custer State Park, Wall Drug (so fun!).  I cannot remember right now if I have been to North Dakota.  I may have been, but I  really can't even recall driving through it.

So what about you?  Any memories about either of these states?  Maybe you live in one of these states.  Have a big celebration today if you do!

For more information, check out these sites:

http://timelines.com/1889/11/2/north-dakota-and-south-dakota-are-the-39th-and-40th-states-admitted-to-the-union

http://www.worldatlas.com/webimage/countrys/namerica/usstates/nd.htm

http://www.worldatlas.com/webimage/countrys/namerica/usstates/sd.htm