Confessions of a Cereal Mother
by Rachel McClellan
In this humorous memoir you’ll discover several mind-saving
rules, which include:
- Don’t throw your pregnancy test away before the full three minutes is up.
- Unless there is a rush on the grocery store pending a zombie-virus outbreak, never take your kids shopping.
- If your toddler is going to chew on a Band-Aid, hope it’s one found inside the community swimming pools chlorinated pool and not one found in their locker room.
- Never throw up in a cookie sheet.
- Things can always get worse. You could discover your child playing with a used tampon applicator. It’s not a whistle, sweetie.
- And most importantly, the moment one of your children is seriously ill, forget about everything else. You have the greatest honor in the world – being a Mom.
- Don’t throw your pregnancy test away before the full three minutes is up.
- Unless there is a rush on the grocery store pending a zombie-virus outbreak, never take your kids shopping.
- If your toddler is going to chew on a Band-Aid, hope it’s one found inside the community swimming pools chlorinated pool and not one found in their locker room.
- Never throw up in a cookie sheet.
- Things can always get worse. You could discover your child playing with a used tampon applicator. It’s not a whistle, sweetie.
- And most importantly, the moment one of your children is seriously ill, forget about everything else. You have the greatest honor in the world – being a Mom.
What others are saying:
"A realistic and humorous take on motherhood. Are you in my house?" --Robin O'Bryant, author of Indie Best-seller, "Ketchup is a Vegetable and Other lies Moms Tell Themselves."
"Delightfully humorous with factual truths about
motherhood and womanhood. You’ll immediately be hooked with her fun
story-telling and hilarious hooks. A truly fantastic read that will not only
lift your motherly spirit, but remind you what motherhood is truly all about…
and it’s all worth it." --Karie Elordi, author of the popular blog "The Dating Divas"
Author Bio:
Once upon a time, in a wonderful and carefree world, Rachel
McClellan fell asleep in a warm and spacious bed, her long hair in great locks
around her, and not a single blemish upon her face. Outside her window,
bluebirds sang and the cloudless blue sky was full of promise.
However, when she awoke she discovered gum in her now ratted
hair, a tiny, chocolate fingerprint smeared across her forehead, and four very
wiggly children crowding her bed. There were no bluebirds singing outside her
window (or perhaps she couldn’t hear them anymore), only a tornado, pulsing
with thunder and lightening. Her world was in chaos, a raging storm on all
fronts.
But what a perfect storm it was…
Find Rachel
Purchase Confessions of a Cereal Mother
Reading those few sentences make me want to read this book.
ReplyDeleteThis seems like a fun book to read!
ReplyDeleteMy 2 year old son called my white hand weights " muscle bones."
ReplyDeleteNancy
allibrary (at) aol (dot) com
My son loves all animals, including insects. When we found our bag of rice in our stock room infested with rice weevils, he said that those are his pets and we are not to kill any single one of them.
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