Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Virtual Author Book Tours: "Before You Say I Do Again" by Benjamin Berkley Book Review

Publisher: Frederick Fell Trade (September 15, 2009
Category: Non-Fiction, Self-Help (Legal)
Tour Dates: February, 2013
Available in: Print, 240 pages
Learning from the mistakes of a failed first marriage and telling yourself you will do better the next time around is like saying if you lose a football game you’ll win the next one.  You will but only if you learn some new plays before you go back on the field.  Presented   by an attorney who has seen all the warning signs, “BEFORE YOU SAY I DO, AGAIN!” will teach those new plays to avoid coming up on the losing side again.
Note, book shelves are filled with warm and fuzzy titles authored by psychologists and family counselors.  Their message is to teach how to listen to each other and improve the relationship.  “BEFORE YOU SAY I DO, AGAIN!”is not a how to book to get back together or to stay together.  Instead it takes the gloves off and provides insight as to the issues one must consider before walking down the aisle a second time.  Tackling a serious subject, but presented in a sometimes whimsical fashion, “BEFORE YOU SAY I DO, AGAIN!” puts the brakes on the wedding ceremony and provides the reader with the questions that must be answered before she drives down the path of destruction.
In addition,   it provides information regarding the legal consequences of a failed second marriage. “BEFORE YOU SAY I DO, AGAIN!” is a “tell it is like it is guide”   to avoid an impending disaster.
 Praise for Before You Say I Do Again:
“According to Psychology Today, 60% of remarriages fail. What are the reasons? Why do people believe that whatever went wrong the first time won’t happen again?  Have you gone through a divorce, found a new partner and are considering remarrying? Perhaps you’re afraid of making the same mistake twice and are thinking of living together first? Do you wonder if you’re doing the right thing?  Before You Say I Do, Again answers these important questions, and much more. Written by a divorce attorney with over 30 years of experience, the book is filled with insightful information, practical advice and statistics supported by research studies.  Besides being chock-full of information, author/attorney Benjamin Berkley writes in a simple, light, engaging style, making the reading experience enjoyable. The structure is clear and well organized. Best of all, it is written by someone who really knows what he’s talking about. If you or someone in your life is considering remarrying, please do yourself a favour and get a copy of this book. It is definitely an eye opener.” Mayra Calvani, BlogCritic Books
“Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. “Before You Say I Do Again: A Buyer’s Beware Guide to Remarriage” is aimed at those who may be taking the dive into marriage the second time and want to be legally prepared this time around. Written from an attorney’s perspective, he offers much advice people should know the second time around to see if you’re truly ready to do it again. “Before You Say I Do Again” is a solid and highly recommended read that’ll educate and make many people reconsider.” Midwest Book Review
“Here’s helpful advice from an attorney, packaged in a readable, insightful new book! Even if you’ve already remarried, you may gain valuable tips here that can help you construct, or re-construct, the legal details of your new marriage.  Divorced? Dating? Considering a new marriage? Pick up this book and read it carefully. You’ll be glad you did.” Dr. David Frisbie, The Center for Marriage & Family Studies
“Before You Say I Do Again is a fantastic tool and worthwhile reading for anyone thinking of remarrying. It might be even better reading for someone stepping into their first marriage. I highly recommend it.” brownlevine, Barnes and Noble. com Reviewer

My rating: 5 of 5 stars
When I read his book "Against My Will," I knew that I wanted to read this book, and I so glad to receive it for review.  Having been married before, this book was quite intriguing.  After all, I do believe that the majority of people who have been married once want to be married again, and Benjamin Berkley agrees.

I love the fact that the author himself is a lawyer who has seen just about every imaginable divorce/remarriage scenario.  He also is himself a remarried man--remarried successfully, I might add.  Drawing on his experience, he covers practically every topic you can think of.  He asks real questions, and he tells real stories.  The book is an easy read because the style is so fluid and straightforward.  He offers real helps, including a sample pre-nuptial agreement and will in the back of the book.  He is not your family nor your friend, so he does not mince words.  He tells you the pure, unadulterated truth.

While I believe that the information and advice in the book is very sound, I do have one minor point of contention.  I realize and understand that the author is coming from a legal standpoint and not a religious perspective (even though he does cover religious issues in the book), but it does bother me that he recommends living together.  I suppose I am not used to hearing people encourage others to have sex before getting married and possibly live together.  I am glad he points out the potential issues and negative statistics of those living together, but he appears to have no qualms about recommending sex before marriage so you can "sample the goods."  Thankfully this is a minor issue in the book, but I would have liked to have seen the flip side of why you shouldn't have sex before getting remarried.  And, of course, my faith is going to cause me to see things differently than many.  And I'm probably not one to be pointing this out since I nearly went down that road myself, but that is another story.

So if you are divorced, I would highly recommend this book to you.  That probably means that at least half of my readers are.  I especially recommend the book if you are a divorced female because the author gives really sound advice to the single women in particular.

I was sent a copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.  I was not financially compensated, and all opinions are 100 percent mine.

About Benjamin Berkley:
Benjamin Berkley is the author of four self-help books:  ”My Wishes, Your Plan for Organizing Your Family’s Needs” (Sourcebooks, June, 2006)   “The Complete Executor’s Guide” (Sourcebooks, June 2007)   “Winning Your Social Security Disability Case” (Sourcebooks, February, 2008) and “Before You Say I Do Again, A Buyer’s Beware Guide to Remarriage.” (Frederick Fell Publishers, September, 2009). “Against My Will” (Fell Publishers, September, 2012) is Benjamin Berkley’s fifth book and debut novel.
And though writing is his passion, for over 34 years he has conducted a busy law practice in which he has seen many interesting clients come through his door.  One in particular, an older woman with white hair, the kindest smile, and an amazing story became the inspiration for one of his characters for “Against My Will.”   Berkley lives in southern California with his wife Phyllis and their cat Riley.   He has two grown children and is always bragging about his most beautiful grandson and granddaughter.
Buy Before You Say I Do, Again at:
Amazon.com               Barnes and Noble       The Book Depository

1 comment:

  1. Thanks for taking part in the tour! I'm so glad you loved Before You Say I Do. I've been happily married for 16 years now with my second husband. I relized when I read the book I followed a lot of Ben's advice without realizing it.


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