183 Ways to Lose Guilt and Find Joy (Guest Post)

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Guilt! She pokes you as you write about your quaint, eccentric aunt. She grabs you as you
wander from e-mail to Facebook to laundry instead of focusing on your work. She kicks you as
you complain about your husband to a friend.
Have you noticed? Women seem riddled with guilt. And it’s hard to know if guilt is legitimate or
simply a product of our imaginations. After all, should we really feel guilty about things over
which we have no control?
The three of us share in a speaking ministry and we have learned a few things about losing guilt
and finding joy through the years:
1. We are not perfect. Sooner or later we say the wrong thing, do the wrong thing or fail to
do the right thing. That’s life. While we feel guilty when we flub up, we thank God that
memory fades and the rhythm of life continues. If our actions have hurt someone, we
apologize—to the other person and to God—then we joyfully move on, guilt free.
2. We have no control over some things, so it’s no use feeling guilty. For instance, our
children may suffer injuries as they participate in sports. When that happens, we look for
ways God may be teaching us and them life lessons and trust God will use the experience
to the good of all involved.
3. We can’t do it all. Much as we want to solve others’ problems, achieve perfection on our
jobs and keep our homes neat and clean as a plastic dollhouse, we can’t. Maybe someday
when we’re old and gray (Ha. Shirley already is, and it hasn’t helped her.) . . . .
We shared our insights in our book, Turning Guilt Trips into Joy Rides. We would love to have
you visit www.friendsoftheheart.us to learn more about us, order the book, invite us to speak or
just to enter our Blog Tour contest. We will give away a free half-hour telephone consultation on
each of the following topics:
1. “Writing for Publication” with Shirley Brosius. If you’re a wannabe writer, Shirley can
suggest ways to get published; if you’re already writing, Shirley can help you set goals and
suggest how to reach them.
2. “Children and Sports: Running the Race from Preschool to College and Life After Sports”
with Janine Boyer. If you’re considering signing up your child for youth sports or wondering
about the impact of sports on college and life beyond, talk to Janine. She can also tell you what
to expect of coaches and how to relate to them.
3. “Building a Youth Ministry” with Kim Messinger. If you’re volunteering as a youth leader at
your church and want your group to grow, talk to Kim. Her youth group increased from 20 to 75
youth--and is still growing.
May Romans 8:1 help you enjoy the abundant life in Christ: Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.
Shirley, Janine and Kim


Kim Messinger, Janine Boyer and Shirley Brosius had a common bond of Christian service when
Christ drew them together for their first small group meeting in January, 1998. Since then they
have drawn closer through life's joys and struggles and found God to be sufficient for their every
need. They call themselves "Friends of the Heart" because their passion is to help women open
their hearts and find joy in Christ. Kim and Janine supported Shirley in writing Sisterhood of
Faith: 365 Life-Changing Stories About Women Who Made a Difference, which was released by
Howard Publishing, a division of Simon & Schuster, in 2006. More recently the three women
worked together to write another devotional book, Turning Guilt Trips into Joy Rides. They have
spoken at women's retreats and events in five states. All three women live in Millersburg ,
Pennsylvania.